Archive | October 2013

He loves me

If I’ve been too quiet, it’s because it’s been quite the year. 🙂 My brain is firing with different things to blog and I don’t even know where to start. Most GOOD bloggers don’t start out with apologies for not blogging, but I determined a long time ago that I am not a GOOD blogger, so I am completely okay with this.

My husband and I have been married for 15 years. We dated for 3 years before that. I think at this point in time, I can say he loves me, he really, really loves me.

Unfortunately, my mind likes to play tricks on me and convince me that my heart doesn’t know what it’s talking about. 🙂 Silly mind.

One question that I often ask my husband is “Why do you love me?”. Is it because I keep up on the laundry, make a nice dinner, have birthed him 4 kids, take care of my step-daughter, write him love notes, etc? He’s always hemmed and hawed over the question and could never give a good enough response.

So upside down, blow drying my hair this morning, I was thinking about WHY I love my husband. I couldn’t really come up with a reason. If I said I love him because he takes out the garbage, does that mean I don’t  love him when he doesn’t? I definitely like that he takes out the garbage, but is that a reason to LOVE him?

I have noticed that he doesn’t love me any more or any less when I clean the house. He doesn’t come home and say “The laundry is done, my dear, I sure adore you because of it!”. He loves me, just because he does. He loves me because of who he is, not because of anything I have done. Likewise, I love him. I just do. If he takes out the garbage, I love him. If he doesn’t take out the garbage, I still love him. If he quits chewing tobacco, I love him, but if he never quits, my love for him will not change.

I’ve been killing myself trying to keep up and measure up, just so my husband will love me more, but there is nothing I can do to make him love me more and there is nothing I can do to make him love me less. He just loves, because that is who he is.

Shouldn’t we all strive to love? Not for what a person has done or hasn’t done for us, but because that is who we are?

1 Corinthians 

13 If I speak in the tongues[a] of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. 2 If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. 3 If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast,[b] but do not have love, I gain nothing.

4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

8 Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. 9 For we know in part and we prophesy in part,10 but when completeness comes, what is in part disappears. 11 When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me. 12 For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.

13 And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

No Better (a repost)

I have been going through some of my writings at my old blog. Although they are not published, I still have access to them. I’ve been so numb to life this past year, I thought that going through things I wrote might make me feel. Through tears, I think it’s working. Here is something I wrote after the Sandusky/ Paterno scandal. I still think it’s important and it’s true:

Most everyone has heard about Penn State and Jerry Sandusky. If not, a quick Google search will bring you up to speed. What Sandusky is accused of is horrifying. It makes us want to shelter our children even more from the horrors of the world. It’s disconcerting when that horror is experienced at the hands of a well respected member of society.

Then there is Joe Paterno. Someone who knew what was going on. It was reported to him. He saw it happen. He turned away.


James 4:17 (NIRV) says So when you know the good things you should do and don’t do them, you sin. 

James 4:17 (The Message) says As it is, you are full of your grandiose selves. All such vaunting self-importance is evil. In fact, if you know the right thing to do and don’t do it, that, for you, is evil.

Many of us have said that wouldn’t be us. We would NEVER turn away like he did. He failed those boys. He failed society.

“If it had been me….”

Well, it IS me.

It is US. 


There are starving children in the world. It’s evil.

There are girls being prostituted for first pick through of garbage trucks: FORWARD EDGE It’s wrong.

There are children being sold into slavery: GHANA @CompassionCan It’s heartbreaking.

There are children who need sponsors to ensure their many needs are met: COMPASSION INTERNATIONAL or AMAZIMA It should never happen.

There are children in foster care, waiting for a forever family.

There are food banks, running dry.

There are elderly, living out their last days/ months/ years, with no one. They are lonely.

There are homeless people, shivering and hungry. A sandwich, a blanket and a word of prayer would go so far.

It’s evil, it’s wrong, it’s heartbreaking, it should never happen. All of these things said in the wake of the Sandusky/ Penn State/ Paterno scandal. I’m not saying those things are wrong to say or think, I’m saying all of it applies to other injustices happening in the world.

You know. I just told you. These are only a FEW of the injustices happening everywhere.

So what are we going to do… now that we know?

Will we turn away?

Or will we do the right thing?

If we turn away, how are we better than Paterno? We see what is happening and we choose to do nothing about it.

We turn away too.

However self serving his reasons were, Paterno had reasons for turning away.

Why do we see what is happening to the least of these:

Matthew 25:35-45

35 For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, 36 I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.’

37 “Then the righteous will answer him, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? 38 When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? 39 When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?’

40 “The King will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.’

41 “Then he will say to those on his left, ‘Depart from me, you who are cursed, into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels. 42 For I was hungry and you gave me nothing to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me nothing to drink, 43 I was a stranger and you did not invite me in, I needed clothes and you did not clothe me, I was sick and in prison and you did not look after me.’

44 “They also will answer, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or needing clothes or sick or in prison, and did not help you?’

45 “He will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did not do for one of the least of these, you did not do for me.’

and then we turn away.